Pride Before the Fall

The stairwell rang with the sound of my footsteps pounding on metal steps, loud, reverberating. And then there was the sound of the man, yelling at me, and then of his footsteps as he followed up behind me, gaining on me. Then the sound of my footsteps, faltering and falling heavier all the time.

More than anything else, the stairwell was filled with the sound of my breathing, more like gasping, as I desperately tried to draw air into my failing lungs. I could hear him gaining on me and I was quickly running out of steam. Things weren't looking good.

Making matters worse, as I was being pursued up these six flights of stairs, I was carrying a ten pound dumbbell in each hand. I was sweating like an overweight tuba player in the Stampede parade. Guys my age can go into cardiac arrest in such situations. After everything I'd ever done in my life, leading to this moment, was I going to die in a freakin' stairwell.

I couldn't go on. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't take one more step. I gave up, slumping down on one of the landings, waiting for my pursuer to overtake me. Which he did. He caught me. He berated me. He challenged me, and then he inspired me to run back down those six flights of stairs. Which I did, although I hardly know how I made it.

On the surface of things, it sounds like it should be easier going down than going up, but lugging those weights creates a brutal searing pain in your thighs. But when you can hardly draw a breath, what's going on with your thighs is maybe the least of your worries.

We made it back down. I was in serious need of an ambulance when to my horror, it was strongly suggested that we do it again. Back up the six flights, back down the six flights. This time in virtual slow motion. What madness was this? Why was it happening to me?

The long and the short of it was that I was trying to get myself back in shape. like many people, I grew up being very active, playing a lot of different sports, some of which I was actually pretty good at. But there comes a point when you start slowing down, figuring that you can always get it back, no problem.

One day not so long ago I looked in the mirror and I really didn't like what I saw there. I also came to the realization that I wasn't going to get it back just by walking to my coffee shop in the morning. let's face it: if I didn't like how I look, how could I expect any one else to? I simply wasn't prepared to become invisible.

Krave Entertainment Magazine was envisioned to be roughly based on the rather quaint and old-fashioned notion of the seven deadly sins. It would seem to me that when it comes to working out, getting in shape, staying in shape - however you want to look at it, whatever you want to call it - covers all of them in very different ways.

Pride, for example, must be one of the prime motivators for all of us when we take those first tentative steps into the gym, or the pool, or the weight room. We must all feel some sense of pride about our physical appearance, and about the aura we project to the rest of the world. Or want to feel it, at least. I would think one of the greatest motivators for getting back into shape must be to look in the mirror and not feel any pride about what you see there. And then decide to do something about it.

And then there's envy: although we might deny it, all of us find ourselves checking out members of the same sex, taking stock of our own situation by comparing ourselves to others. Part of this has to do with wealth and materialistic pursuits and acquisitions, but the heart of the matter is that seeing someone who is looking good because he is looking after himself, or she is looking after herself, makes us feel envious and perhaps even a tad guilty at how we've been letting things slide on the home front. It amounts to taking care of the things we can take care of.

Gluttony enters into the question because working out is one antidote to overindulging. It's a well know fact that gyms are at their busiest following the Christmas holidays. Theoretically, if you work out enough, there isn't anything you shouldn't be able to indulge in with no lasting consequence. No doubt we have all come to the profound insight that it's much more pleasurable getting out of shape than it is getting back into shape, especially after a long holiday season of givin' 'er. lust. Well, lust speaks for itself. We want and need to do what we can to be desirable to others. We should be able to bring the same qualities to the table, or the bed, or whatever, that we are looking for in a partner. Or partners, depending on the night. Hardly a sin when looked at this way, lust is perhaps the greatest motivator when it comes to getting in shape. Or, to be Freudian about it, anything else, for that matter.

Greed. In it's worst sense, looking around Alberta these days we see evidence of greed everywhere - for example, astronomical raises in rent, making life in Calgary and Edmonton difficult for many, causing more and more of us to work at two jobs, if not three, just trying to maintain some semblance of a pleasurable lifestyle. Even if our motivation stems from something negative like greed, what life in Alberta comes down to for many these days is survival of the fittest. Alberta tends to attract people who don't just want to get by, but who want to get ahead. Hell, we want to get rich. Survival of the fittest? You bet. You have to be fit. You have to take every advantage you possibly can to get ahead, and that starts the well-being of both the body and mind.

Anger can be directed both outward an inward. As often as we get angry at someone else, we more often get angry at ourselves, especially when we find ourselves in a bad situation we could have avoided. like getting sick in the middle of winter. Maybe it's unavoidable, to a certain extent, but we could eat better and take our vitamins, if nothing else. And we will do these simple things to help ourselves if we get angry enough at ourselves. On the other side of the coin, let's face it - if you're angry at your boss or your girlfriend, working out is a great way to channel all that negative energy into something positive.

The last of the sins, and my personal favourite these days (with the exception of lust, of course) is sloth - laziness taken to the nth degree. Overcoming sloth to even get in the car to drive to the gym can be one the most significant steps on the journey to better shape and better health. living in a fast-paced society like we have in Alberta these days, sloth can actually look very attractive at times. Imagine, just lying on the couch all day, ordering in pizza and watching movies. Not even getting dressed! In my mind, that doesn't sound like such a bad idea.

Well, I was far from that the day my friend Al was chasing me up and down those stairs. Sad to say, I got busy and we didn't continue on together. But now when I look in the mirror in the morning, I get angry at myself for letting my sloth win the day. I take little pride in my appearance. I'm not really motivated by greed and I don't really feel envy towards anyone else, but when I look at the future and think of all the lustful times that could be in store for me, I think to myself, I've got to get back on that stairway again before it's too late. I'm going to get in shape again - if it kills me.

 

Written by Eugene Stickland